THE THERAPIST IS IN!
RELATIONSHIP CHECK UP
There are very few guarantees in life but one is certain, everything changes: day changes to night, morning to evening and summer to fall. People of course are no exception; we physically change from young to old. There are times we change for the better and at times the changes are undesirable.
Being in a relationship requires work, whether it is working on communication between the parties involved or works on other issues. One comment that I continually make to my clients who are experiencing relationship difficulties is that they may have known what their partner wanted in the past, but have they stopped lately to ask what they currently want. Unfortunately, most individuals rely on past knowledge and this is often where the problems arise. Ask yourself, when was the last time you sat down and did a relationship checkup. When it comes to relationships, an ounce of prevention is truly worth a pound of cure.
Does the relationship still meet your partner’s needs? Are there things you could both do differently? Are they happy with the sex and with intimacy? Has the intimacy changed for better or for worse, and if so why? Has your partner asked you what you like or what changes you would like to see?
Too often people think they know these answers but have not done a checkup on their relationship in years. Just like health prevention, it is never too soon to start doing the right thing. It is important to conduct a relationship checkup no matter how long you have been together.
How do you start a “relationship check up”? If you want something from your partner, start by doing it first; if you want a kiss ask for one. If you want increased sexual intimacy ask for it. Relationships take work, but the work does not have to be hard. When you open up a conversation with your significant other, you must be willing to talk about it or return to it later. Just think about the last time you really took time to share with your mate about the changes you may both want to make. Intimacy really is “into me you see”. The best relationship of your life could be just a few words away.
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